Moving on sometimes means more than putting things in a box to stumble across later when your life is relatively excitement-free.

Sometimes “moving on” means throwing the box and it’s contents away because you need the space it is currently occupying for something else more connected to your present circumstances, no matter how routine they may feel in comparison to the rosy past.

Throwing the box away and making space in your life and your closet for more recent and relevant things does not make the box irrelevant. It does not scorn the memories you have of a different time, a different place, a different life. Throwing the box away does not mean forgetting the person you were, nor the person you were with when you had space in your life for enough notes to fill up a box. It means that you can now carry the person who wrote those notes you saved in your heart every day, subconsciously and naturally, by just being you. It means you no longer assign the duties of carving out your identity to someone else, who likely is struggling caring for their own identity first.

If not for that person who wrote those notes in that box, you wouldn’t be who you are today. Perhaps moving on really means cherishing what you have learned and experienced through that person by simply living your life. Perhaps moving on means not leaving anything behind in a box to revisit (consciously or otherwise) when you’re feeling lonely.

Sending you lots of love — and I hope that if you do reach out and make contact that you take your current life into consideration before trying to Frankenstein it with your past. Instead, I implore you to first see how he manifests in your life now and since then, rather than merely mourning his absence from your side.

If you want to resolve things with him, let him know that things aren’t resolved yet with you. If he forgave you for your actions, then maybe he might be willing or able to help you forgive yourself your emotions.

Sending love and clarity. XX